Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Hitting the Ball in Outer Space

It has been rumored that Carlos Quentin’s superhero powers come from a very strong alliance of other superheroes. The nature of his birth has recently been discovered. In the most potent high-five in history, Superman and Chuck Norris’s energies collided and, much like the big bang, creation occurred. From the explosion of their high five were born Quentin and his fraternal twin Alexei Ramirez. Of this explosion, there is rumored to be a third brother, Gavin Floyd, whose powers are so great, he can only be unleashed every 5 days (4, if he has to go on short rest).

Needless to say, I haven’t slept since the Sunday before we started our series against Minnesota. For the first time in over a week, I couldn’t sleep last night because I was excited. During the past 15 hours (If I was to guesstimate), I was followed by White Sox talk wherever I went. “He pitched on 3 days’ rest. Isn’t that crazy?” “His fourth Grand Slam! That’s a rookie record!” It’s been a crazy ride so far, and yesterday just summed it all up nicely.

First, there was Gavin Floyd. I really have no words for how much respect I have for him. Honestly, I don’t want to put the jinx on him, but he had another one of those Gavin Floyd days. He had one earned run for the night, allowing 2 to cross home plate over 6 innings, and striking out 8. There was a moment in the 6th where he airmailed a ball he bobbled on a swinging bunt when a runner scored. He was so upset with himself I thought we (Gavin & I both) would fall over. Ozzie came to the mound. I was thinking he would pull him because there’s no way he would compose himself after that. I think my heart was still palpitating from that play well into the night. Gavin must’ve said something along the lines of, “Everyone chillax, I got this!” he got a “keep going” pat from Ozzie and he, in fact, got it together. He threw 118 pitches over 6 innings on 3 days’ rest. When does MVP talk start about this guy?

Well, how about when he picks up his 17th win? With a little help from Alexei, Gavin did just that in the most important game so far. And by a little help, I mean, Alexei Ramirez hit his 4th grand slam of the season. [Off the same bullpen that gave "The Rock" Wise a grand slam just a few weeks ago.] Gotta love that little guy! Hopefully, his fiery kablam-o will give the Sox enough momentum to juggernaut their way through a last do or die game against the Twinkies. I have a feeling that a Sox win will boost Twinkie/Champagne sales in the Chicagoland area. Diehard Sox fans will saturate the Twinkies in champagne and feast on the delicious treat the same way the Sox will devour them tonight, if all goes according to plan. May I remind you that the last time the Twinks came to town, Joe Crede was declared AL co-player of the Week, after homering twice on 2 consecutive days, to make it 5 homers in 3 days, a zillion RBI, went 4-for-4... and overall helped sweep the Twins so that the Sox could pull ahead to something like a 6-game divisional lead. Nothing would make me happier than a second helping of that!

As for the actual odds, we are leaning on John Danks on 3 days rest as a pitcher. We are playing a team whose record (home and away) is identical to ours, and anything could happen. Thankfully, the Sox will take the Twinks on at home, where the stadium is sold out- it was sold out within an hour. The Sox have called for a “blackout,” a game where everyone will show Sox solidarity by wearing all black and will distribute black rally towels to all entering the stadium. The energy should be electric as the Sox attempt to win the AL Central Division.

As for odds and ends, I found this video recently. (EDIT: Props to Jeeves @ Life in the Cell. He found it first.) This pretty much sums up exactly how I feel about Swish. I’ll post it below.

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

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