I have had the most exhausting week. [I'm pretty sure I have a point, I promise] I got home yesterday, finished up some research before the game, including watching that interview they did with Gavin- gotta love that guy. Anyway, fell asleep, woke up and checked Gameday for our lineup and game time for the Twinkers, only to see they’re playing “TB.” TB? Tuberculosis? I can only hope. To Be [Determined]? Tampa Bay! The Rays! The baseball gods are Sox fans, and I just found this out today?! I did what any normal person waking up from a nap during which he/she dreamed about Ozzie refusing to let Gavin pitch unless he got a haircut, so he/she had to cut his hair him/herself would do: I checked my closet to make sure Gavin wasn’t there, and checked Nick Swisher’s batting average (It’s like pinching yourself, but more painful.) to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. I was so excited going into yesterday’s game, I had already put the AL Central title in my pocket and blew a raspberry at the Twins for good. But, I had counted my chickens prematurely. Darn it, Javi Vazquez for blowing that game early yesterday! I was too frustrated to write about yesterday’s game, so I wasted some perfectly good clever bits I could’ve started my post with. It’s okay, you can still hear about them. First of all, there was the guy who threw first pitch- the oldest living man to have played baseball or something. Or as I like to call him, Jose Contreras’s son! Ba-dum chh! I even came up with a nickname for Dewayne “The Rock” Johnson Wise. [You're welcome!] In case you were looking for anything good about yesterday, OC had 2 hits and PK had a solo homer in the 9th. And was fast enough to avoid a double play. [That sounds made up, doesn’t it?] My biggest gripe was that they brought out H. Ramirez when the turf hit the fan. Shoulda brought out Broadway since they were going to try starting him anyway and they had a lot of time to kill. Once again, I have to insist that he’s not as bad as his numbers say. [Look at me. Defending Broadway, Wassermann, BA. Next thing you know, I’ll be saying Nick Swisher is the best hitter on our ballclub. Alright, that would be an exaggeration.]
That seems like more than enough about yesterday’s game. I was wondering if the Sox were going to go in the game with the same disappointed mentality I had, or if they’re going to try to take advantage of the Royals. [I was also thinking they should give Broadway a start sometime this series since he does well against KC anyway and he held his own against the Yankers yesterday. I’m not a big fan of this short rest business.]
It turns out the Sox decided to take their frustrations out on KC. The Sox pummeled the Royals 9-4, while the Twins lost 11-1 to regain a 2.5 lead of the division. Buehrle was pitching himself a pretty good game, throwing first pitch strikes quite consistently. The only notable troubles came from Teahen’s 3-run homer. Thornton was out in the 7th. He had one earned run, but had an overall good inning with some help from Anderson and Wise. Dotel came in the 8th and, thankfully, had a flawless inning. Linebrink closed. He got the first batter to fly out, but my thoughts were, “Does anyone else see a picture of Boone Logan's terrifying goatee on the back panel?” The next guy had a groundout, and then Cabrera air mailed one just when it shoulda been over. “And this ball game is- nope.” Thankfully, Linebrink looked like he felt good by the time he got to the fourth and last batter, Kila Ka'aihue. [To quote Hawk and DJ, “Try to say his name 5 times fast.” “No.”]
There was also some solid hitting. By Cabrera, especially, who is on an absolute roll this month. He’s hitting .400 in the last 10 games and .377 in September. Dewayne “The Rock” Wise had 2 home runs of the solo persuasion in the 7th and 9th innings. [What I actually wrote in my notes was, “How do you feel about that, Swish? He swings for homers and gets them. Sorry, BA.”] Jim Thome hit his 33rd home run of the year, and JD had his 40th double of the season. Konerko only walked today, but can’t expect him to be the best hitter of every game. And then there was Alexei Ramirez. He only had one hit for the night, but it just happened to be the 3rd grand slam of the year for him. Not too shabby, after being responsible for making it home on a good call by Cox and sliding over the plate, while managing not to touch even a quarter of a centimeter of it. And Nick Swisher had 2 base hits today. 2! And they weren’t doubles, and they weren’t wild swings for the back panel! Amen.
And, in a final paragraph of nonsense and silliness, some notes. Over at Kauffman Stadium, AJ had a pitching change in the middle of his at bat. Who does that? In Tampa, the Minny pitcher had to be changed by the 2nd inning. The replacement? Boof [I kid ya not!] Bonser. Is that short for something? Boofer? Boofbert? Generally, I tune out the Hawkwaroo and Deej because they have a distaste for the English language, but I accidentally caught a bit of their commentary. I accidentally heard them talking about – Reggie Jackson was it? Basically, he was the first “sexy” baseball player. And then proceeded to talk about guys that like to walk naked around the locker room. I’m sure DJ’s going to miss the clever banter and insightful commentary has to offer…
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